39-40 weeks

Hey there little guy,

It is with great excitement and pride that I get to wish you a happy due date! Part of me is still in shock that this highly anticipated (though also a bit arbitrary) date has finally arrived. Woohoo!!

This week everyone keeps asking us if we are ready for you. I usually say no, but only because I feel like overconfidence is bad form... the truth is that I do feel ready. Your dad and I are both content to wait until you're ready, but there are lots of sideways smiles and secret hand squeezes. We are so close to meeting you!

We've set up the birth tub in the living room, but we're waiting on a cue from you that it's time to fill it. The tub is bright blue, and the shell of it is covered in signatures notating the names and weights of all the babies born in there. It will be a triumphant moment when we get to pick up a Sharpie and add you to the roster!

In your 39th week, your aunt Marion came over to check out the tub, and we baked a sweet potato cake and made some lovely new curtains. I unleashed my nesting instincts on the office at work and got it perfectly organized before my leave of absence. Your grandmother arrived from TN just in time for my 40-week visit with the midwife. We talked contingency plans for post date, though hopefully they won't be necessary... and fortunately this morning I was informed by a car salesman that you will be arriving on Friday at 3pm. How kind of him to let me know! :-)

Sweet T and Pop sent us this little gem of your dad at one day old -

If the photo is any indicator, you've definitely got the adorable gene! 

We love you.

From Mom 

Hey Buddy.....



While I'm unsure what age you'll be reading these letters, let me just say that there have been tons of hormones flying around during the 9 months of your development.  Hormones? That's an entire life lesson in itself, of which I'm happy to sharewith you at the appropriate time, but suffice to say that we're allexcited for your arrival!  I would have written sooner, but I had so many thoughts it was hard to distill them.  

That said, I can also tend to quickly drop to the bottom line.  I was there when your dad was born, I was there while he grew up and becamethe incredible guy he is.  I was there when your dad fell in love with your mom. At this point, I've only gotten to know her over a few years, but wow.  What a wonderful person! I was there when they married, and was (virtually) there when they shared the greatnews you were coming.  

Even better yet, I've gotten to know your aunts and other grandparents. They all have SO much to share with you!

Growing up isn't easy.  Hasn't been for any of us, but that's part ofwhat makes it all worth while.  We grow, we learn, and weanticipate all that God has destined each of us to become.  Therewill be great, wonderful (and sometimes painful) lessons along theway.  There are really only three things that make me incredibly confident in who you will become........ your dad, your mom and the Lord!  All of them so love you.  We, do too, but your parents will be the ones to raise, nurture and teach you.  I'm so confident (and proud) in both of their abilities, that I could cry about it at the drop of a hat (not normal for me).  

Just know, we're here when you need us (me and Sweet T), but I'm sure itwill only be for 'additional' support cause your parents are SO awesome!!  As you grow into your teens, you'll start to think your folks don't understand and are a bit 'out there'.  Just know, that's a normal feeling at this age, and as long as you respect them as your parents, you'll eventually find they know a lot more, and love you a lot more than you thought possible.  It's happened to all of us, so my advice is to try to roll with it :)  In the meantime, just know we love you already. We're excited to meet you in person.  And we're excited to do life together with you. See you soon pal.........

Dear baby,

I'm getting anxious for you to get here. This whole time I have imagined you in some embryonic state, moving around slowly in an alternate world, a world distinct and distant, wholly apart from us for 9 long months. And suddenly 8 and a half months flew by, a blur of Seattle rain, and then sun, and then more rain. I learned things, and played things, and thought about you as some intangible, although pleasant, being. And suddenly, today, I realized that you are REAL. You will exist! And I can't wait to hold you and play with you and watch you grow. You will have so many people kissing your cheeks that you might be overwhelmed. But don't worry. Later on, when you are grown up, you will be glad. And someday you will be eight, and then twelve, and then twenty-one, like me.

This is what is happening in my life right now: I was elected to be co-director of the UW Student Food Cooperative for next year. I am working in a cooking school, and my boss loves to yell at me. I live in a sorority, I sleep until noon, and I am studying backyard chickens while working on getting a college degree. I go to coffee shops in the morning, and bars at night, and people amaze me. When you know me later, will you think it strange that I did these things? Will I be old and weird? Will you find the music I like incredibly old and strange? Probably so. Either way, I can't wait until I can hang out with you.

There is so much to tell you, and lots of time to tell, although it feels so urgent to teach you all the things I have learned in my (somewhat short) life. The thing I want to tell you today is: life passes quickly, little one. Don't let it pass you by too quickly! Embrace the day! Do things! But you will learn this lesson later.

Endless love,
Marion

38 weeks

Dear baby,

Back in the fall when we first discovered you existed, I started to make space for you in my mind and in my body. This week I started to make space for you in our house.

I put your clothes in our dresser, your bottles in our kitchen, your nail clippers in our medicine cabinet, your sleeper in our bed, your carseat in our car. I thought I had gotten used to the idea of you, but when I see these baby things scattered among our stuff, I am not so sure. I wonder how I will ever make enough space for you in my life that is already so full. I think about how sad I am to have to share my drawers and shrink my space, shrink my job and my disposable income and my alone time with your dad. I worry that I will have just shrink into your shadow to make it all fit, but the parents I know tell me it doesn't work like that. They assure me that the rest of life just grows and grows to make room for babies. It must be true, because I can feel the heart expansion starting already...

Here's some of what happened in your 38th week:
Gibson's opened a new store in Westgate, and we secured a new tenant for the downstairs. We worked and ate happy hour pizza and went to our first downtown farmer's market of the season. I also had my last prenatal appointment with Nurse Brenda, though she'll be back soon to check on you!
This week we made four trips to Lowe's (oh the joys of new homeownership!), and during one of them an employee pointed at your bump and said, "Didn't your parents warn you not to swallow watermelon seeds?" Hehe.
Today your dad accidentally watered our coffee plant with my Gentle Birth herbal tonic. I'm afraid the jokes about plant fertility will never end...
And of course, we waited for you, hoping for an arrival despite our overall lack of preparedness and the statistical improbability of early delivery for first-time moms. What can I say? We are looking forward to meeting you!

Love, Mom

Hi Little Man, 

O what a special day, October 10, 2011, when we learned of you (you were the size of an olive!).  From that moment since, I’ve been in love!  Sounds just a little bit silly doesn’t it? I know, I know…but it’s true!  Your dad and mom called, sharing the good news and my heart leapt with joy.  Aunt Shelly and I did a happy dance right there in the kitchen!  

Pop was out picking up a pizza but I couldn’t wait to tell him so I grabbed my phone to call him right away.  He didn’t believe me at first but Aunt Shelly quickly convinced him it was no joke…you would be arriving in late May or early June of 2012.  Little man, we have been celebrating you ever since!  

After that call, I went straightaway to our bedroom, bent down before the Lord and thanked Him again and again for expanding our family with you.  I thanked God for the perfect way He would knit you inside your mama’s belly.  I thank Him for all the ways in which you will be a world changer.  I thanked Him for the friendship you would have with Him one day and on and on we talked about you that night!  God and I have talked many times about you since little man.   O the future ahead for you!

When I think about my son (your daddy) having a son I start to tear up.  I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday.  How could I ever forget the blessing of my Jason Michael?  He was a gift then and continues to be so. I smile just saying his name. Little man, listen to him.  He’s an honest and loving man.  He’ll take great care and thought in raising you. He’ll teach you in the way you should go, paying special attention to your gifts, talents and strengths and nurturing them.  He’ll show you how to be a light in a dark world.  Trust him to always be for you…cause he is. 

And little man, I’ve only known your mama for a few years but it didn’t take very long to discover the treasure that she is. Let me tell you some of what you can expect from her.  She will call out greatness in you.  She’ll believe in you all the days of your life.  She’ll declare the goodness of God over you and will guard and defend you when the world is unjust.  No matter how big you get, she’ll wrap you in her arms and pour out all her love on you.  Yes, she’ll teach you how to love, how to serve others and how to choose wisely even when you don’t want to.  Don’t forget it, she’s hand picked by God to be your mom and she’s a gift to you.  You see, little man, your mama is not just carrying you for 9 months.  She will carry you for life.  

Pop and I, well…we can’t wait to teach you some of what we know too.  We’ve learned so many things about life the hard way and we hope to help you avoid some of our pitfalls and mistakes.  We like to laugh big, play lots of loud music and we enjoy great conversation over ice cream and chocolate cake now and then.  We’re far from perfect people but we know how to love and we can’t wait to love on you! 

Your arrival day is so very close and I’ve got my dancing shoes on for another happy dance!  

Much love little one,

Sweet T

37 weeks

Dear boy,

It's Mother's Day today, and this is my first year to be on the receiving end of the day's requisite thanks and well wishes. The compliments are making me squirm a little - although intellectually I do consider myself a mother, so far I feel more like your house than your mom! (Of course that didn't stop me from eating one of the moms-only cupcakes at church this morning, haha!)

It's been a peaceful week - quiet mornings cutting strawberries in the yogurt shop, a visit to the midwife, a business mixer, a scripture study with our Life Group, a neighborhood barbecue, a rainbow of brand new diapers, sweet tea on the front porch while your dad plants flowers, a stroll along the waterfront followed by fish and chips from our favorite seafood shack. We are heeding all the warnings to "sleep while we can" and getting out of bed slowly in the mornings.

I am trying to memorize all these details of our daily life before you come along and make a big beautiful mess of things. We are thrilled to meet you, but I'll admit to feeling a little sentimental about leaving behind our relatively serene existence as a family of two. Tomorrow you are 38 weeks young, and in many ways it feels like the calm before the storm.

Our little baby boy! I am trying to imagine your smallness, your wrinkly skin and your tiny starfish hands. I wish my belly was a fishbowl so we could see you swimming! You're not so wiggly any more, which I hope means you're locked in position, resting up for your big debut...

We love you, kiddo.
From your mama

36 weeks

Dear baby,

For months I've been hard at work house hunting, baby growing, and career ladder climbing... and now, in May, all of my efforts are paying off simultaneously. In a strange twist of fate, I got a promotion at work effective today - the exact day my pregnancy with you is full term. After such a long season of waiting, it is strange to be entering the season of arrival: arrival at a professional goal, arrival in our new house, arrival to the more hands-on part of motherhood.

We had our home visit with the midwife this week and got to hear your whirling heartbeat inside the walls of new house. Our midwife said it would be a great space in which to give birth - though she did recommend we put some window coverings before delivery day, haha! We had already ordered custom blinds online... hopefully they arrive before you do!

I've been trying to get your clothes washed and your things in order, but I've discovered that it is very difficult to nest in a construction zone. Things around here are altogether too wonderful to be perturbed about the dust and the noise, but I am taking notes in case you're ever lucky enough to get a sibling - no construction projects in the third trimester, period.

Although you're unlikely to come this early, it is strange to think that this could be the last letter I write before you are born. I'm attempting to enjoy what could be the last few weeks of pregnancy - slowly writing myself off the schedule at work and spending this afternoon on the deck drinking virgin margaritas leftover from last night's Cinco de Mayo bash.

I am ready for you to be in my arms instead of my belly, but there won't be Pitocin or Castor oil for this pregnant lady... I'll just leave the birthday timing up to you and Jesus.
See you soon?
Love, your mama

34-35 weeks

Dear sweet little wiggly baby of mine,

I come from a family of all girls, and so well-wishers are sometimes concerned about my lack of experience with boys. They wonder aloud how, with a family history so dominantly feminine, I will handle the task of raising a little man like yourself.

But all their fears are unfounded, little one, because you really hit the jackpot when it comes to male role modeling. Of course the man I'm thinking of is your dad, and tomorrow he turns 26!

If you're even remotely conscious in there, you already have his hands and his voice memorized. You know how attentive he is to your needs and how he adores you. What you don't know yet is how rare guys like your dad are. Ambitious yet playful, unfazed by negativity, self-assured and resourceful, talented but humble; patient, curious, inclusive, kind - altogether a stellar combination that we'd be blessed to even begin to replicate in you.

Your dad and I met on camping trip in the summer of 2008. Of course we nearly missed each other entirely - I was home for a few short weeks between summer camp and traveling to India. Jason had flown home from a backpacking jaunt around Mexico the night before we met, and almost cancelled on the trip due to a bad case of traveler's diarrhea. But my very persuasive friend implored him to come anyway, and so he threw his gear in pack and put the rest of us to shame carrying both his pack and another girl's, hopping off the trail to relieve himself as often as needed, and altogether hiking like the champion he is.

Later, on one our first dates, I got a blowout on the interstate. Jason was in the passenger seat talking on the phone and mouthed the words "pull over" to me. He got out of the car, opened the truck, and changed the flat tire in less than five minutes, never even hanging up the phone. I was duly impressed by his competence and composure, and although it would make a nice story to say that that's the moment I knew he was the man I'd marry... I don't remember it like that. I remember hundreds of moments of growing clarity, moments of joy and nervousness and two whole years of that dizzying intoxication of infatuation... and to tell you the truth, I still feel a little drunk when I look at him.

There you have it - your mama at her sappiest, and a bit of the love story from which you got your beginnings.

We're taking the weekend off to celebrate your dad, so don't even think about an early entrance. No shared birthdays in this family, okay?
Love, Mom

P.S. Sorry there's no letter from last week. It was a little chaotic around here with your baby shower and the move. That's right, your dad I became homeowners! We have so much to be thankful for.