Today is the last day of our 26th week, baby boy!
Jackie and Dave got married last night. I got to take you and your bump out on wedding dance floor for some serious swinging. I should probably warn you that both your parents are both completely shameless dancers. You have so many hours of embarrassment to look forward to...
You made everything about the wedding a bit more sentimental. You, little boy, are the lens through which I watched the slideshow of childhood photos of the bride and groom. I got a bit weepy imagining your wedding, and you aren't even born yet!
Your grandparents have been here all week - Sweet T and Pop, Jason's parents. The four of us shared a beautiful suite near the Seattle wedding venue and got to enjoy the market and Dahlia bakery donuts together. Jason's dad says being around us brings back so many memories of when they were in our position, and Jason was the wiggling baby inside someone's belly. His mom tells me that although they were married for five years before they had kids, it felt like time began when Jason was born... Being pregnant makes me feel a little like that, like time has truly begun. For the first time, I see the weeks passing right before my eyes - I see the passage of time every time I look down at my growing lap. Seriously, baby, the last six months have flown by. All of the sudden I look and feel like a bonafide pregnant woman.
Everyone's begging for belly shots but my phone camera got water in it and I've been a little self conscious about modeling. But between the visiting Keils and my little sister, a few photos were finally snapped this weekend in Seattle. Your first portraits! Maybe we should make you a scrapbook, although it will probably be a few years before you can appreciate it.
We sure do love you, little one.
From your mom.
February 18, 2012
25 weeks
Son-
Your mom is 25 weeks and as round as a Chinese Buddha! This is what I thought when I looked in the mirror Monday morning. My friends coo and touch and laugh about how HUGE I am, but strangers and acquaintances still raise their eyebrows suspiciously. "Aren't you a little small for 6 months?"
At a Valentine's Day party last weekend, half the women in the room are pregnant. I cozy up to the hostess, a first time mom of a one-year-old. I work up the courage to ask if she enjoys parenting. I tell her I know how good it is, how blessed and rewarding, how miraculous and wonderful... but I what I really want to know is if she likes the day-to-day work of rearing a little tot. She hesitates before saying that yes, yes, she does enjoy it... But then she blushes and admits that she didn't enjoy it at first.
Nurse Brenda says she didn't enjoy parenting until her firstborn started to smile at her. She said after six weeks of manual labor, when she saw that little crescent spread across her daughter's face, she finally felt known and appreciated! Maybe you could start practicing your smiles now so your dad and I have an easier time of things this June?
In our meeting Wednesday, Nurse Brenda told me something I haven't been able to forget. She said you cry in the womb, but of course your cries are muted by all the amniotic fluid, placenta, and flesh that separates us. I can't tell you how much this distresses me. I picture you trapped and bawling silently, like a goldfish in a Ziplock bag on the way home from the fair. We'll get you out of there soon, I promise!
As usual, we never quite stop talking and thinking about you, little one.
Always in love, your mama.
Your mom is 25 weeks and as round as a Chinese Buddha! This is what I thought when I looked in the mirror Monday morning. My friends coo and touch and laugh about how HUGE I am, but strangers and acquaintances still raise their eyebrows suspiciously. "Aren't you a little small for 6 months?"
At a Valentine's Day party last weekend, half the women in the room are pregnant. I cozy up to the hostess, a first time mom of a one-year-old. I work up the courage to ask if she enjoys parenting. I tell her I know how good it is, how blessed and rewarding, how miraculous and wonderful... but I what I really want to know is if she likes the day-to-day work of rearing a little tot. She hesitates before saying that yes, yes, she does enjoy it... But then she blushes and admits that she didn't enjoy it at first.
Nurse Brenda says she didn't enjoy parenting until her firstborn started to smile at her. She said after six weeks of manual labor, when she saw that little crescent spread across her daughter's face, she finally felt known and appreciated! Maybe you could start practicing your smiles now so your dad and I have an easier time of things this June?
In our meeting Wednesday, Nurse Brenda told me something I haven't been able to forget. She said you cry in the womb, but of course your cries are muted by all the amniotic fluid, placenta, and flesh that separates us. I can't tell you how much this distresses me. I picture you trapped and bawling silently, like a goldfish in a Ziplock bag on the way home from the fair. We'll get you out of there soon, I promise!
As usual, we never quite stop talking and thinking about you, little one.
Always in love, your mama.
February 10, 2012
24 weeks
Hey baby-
As of Monday, you are 24 weeks in the making!
I keep seeing bump-less women around town, jogging effortlessly down the road, eating sushi, wearing adorably tight jeans. I watch them and feel these intense pangs of jealousy... but then I remember that the frumpy leggings and lingering food aversions are an integral part of this process that brings you into our little family, and nothing can steal my joy.
Now that I've (mostly) got the whole pregnancy thing down, we are thinking more about parenting, gobbling up the relevant podcasts and articles. In so many ways (mostly my age and punk-rock haircut), I still feel like such an unlikely candidate for parenthood. I try to picture myself with you as a newborn. I tell Jason, "He needs us so much."All that love and all that anxiety... how will I bear it?
Your dad and I celebrated our first anniversary this week. The weather was beautiful, so we took a boat to Seattle and tromped around the sunshiny market eating French pastries before we meeting your aunt Marion at the aquarium. We wanted to go snowshoeing up in the mountains on Sunday (our actual anniversary), but we didn't have tire chains for the car and it ended up being an uncomfortable (read: big wiggly belly) day for me. We ate pizza and cake at home instead, laughing because we never in a million years imagined ourselves discussing baby names on our first anniversary.
Last night I dragged Jason to the Vagina Monologues at PLU. I felt a hot and breathy excitement during the monologue about childbirth. I cannot believe that that is how it happens, how people happen, how you will happen! I am awestruck, literally. What a miracle.
As usual, we are smitten with you. You and your little 1.5 pound body just going about your business inside of me... it's utterly unnerving and altogether wonderful. The midwife says that size-wise, you're in the 66th percentile. Keep up the good work! I am very proud.
Love from your mom.
As of Monday, you are 24 weeks in the making!
I keep seeing bump-less women around town, jogging effortlessly down the road, eating sushi, wearing adorably tight jeans. I watch them and feel these intense pangs of jealousy... but then I remember that the frumpy leggings and lingering food aversions are an integral part of this process that brings you into our little family, and nothing can steal my joy.
Now that I've (mostly) got the whole pregnancy thing down, we are thinking more about parenting, gobbling up the relevant podcasts and articles. In so many ways (mostly my age and punk-rock haircut), I still feel like such an unlikely candidate for parenthood. I try to picture myself with you as a newborn. I tell Jason, "He needs us so much."All that love and all that anxiety... how will I bear it?
Your dad and I celebrated our first anniversary this week. The weather was beautiful, so we took a boat to Seattle and tromped around the sunshiny market eating French pastries before we meeting your aunt Marion at the aquarium. We wanted to go snowshoeing up in the mountains on Sunday (our actual anniversary), but we didn't have tire chains for the car and it ended up being an uncomfortable (read: big wiggly belly) day for me. We ate pizza and cake at home instead, laughing because we never in a million years imagined ourselves discussing baby names on our first anniversary.
Last night I dragged Jason to the Vagina Monologues at PLU. I felt a hot and breathy excitement during the monologue about childbirth. I cannot believe that that is how it happens, how people happen, how you will happen! I am awestruck, literally. What a miracle.
As usual, we are smitten with you. You and your little 1.5 pound body just going about your business inside of me... it's utterly unnerving and altogether wonderful. The midwife says that size-wise, you're in the 66th percentile. Keep up the good work! I am very proud.
Love from your mom.
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